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News: Gaming Munchies

As a fatass trapped in a 5’11”, 140 lb frame (I’m not fat), trapped behind a desk for 50 hours a week, I enjoy munchies at work, as well as before, during, and after gaming.  For some reason I can pack away more pizza, chips, and soda while gaming then at a normal event.  Probably because I am preoccupied with pwning and not on the layer of crumbs on my jeans.

Anyways, as I age and find myself trying to eat healthier as I am too lazy to actually do exercise and still have the metabolism of a (lazy) cheetah, I also find myself splurging on the weekends, and discovering new snacks to gorge upon.  Here is a list of munchies I enjoy whilst having fun with controllers.

Doritos: Many flavors and shapes (3D) have come and gone.  The Cooler Ranch and Nacho Cheesier will always be staples though.  However there are some really impressive new flavors out.   Blazin’ Buffalo & Ranch and Spicy Nacho/Zesty Taco have quickly become favorites for their diversity and delicity.  Our group has gone through bags of them in the span of an hour.  I recommend picking them up when they are BOGO (Buy One Get One).  Now I will admit there are healthier and better tasting chips out there, but lets face it, Doritos are triangular crack.  This is the reason XBox360 controllers are non-stick, but still, show some courtesy, wipe your hands on your pants or a napkin.

Cookies: Again, what usually gets me on cookies is the BOGO.  Oreos, Chewy Chipsahoy, Soft Batch, whatever, they all taste great.

Candy: I discovered today Werther’s makes chewy caramels.  I know, shocking, but they won the 2007 ChefsBest Best Taste Award.  What does that mean? Other than looking like caramel tootsie rolls and working the same way (I’m going to be picking at bits of caramel off of my teeth for the rest of the day), they taste all right.  In other gaming candy, anything that doesn’t really cause a mess works: chocolate bites like Hershey’s Treasures and Kisses are great because you can throw the foil balls at your friends.  Lollipops and gum, not so much.  Choose lifesavers and jolly ranchers over things that may be found weeks later on the back of a cushion.

Beverages: I enjoy beer.  And Scotch.  And White Russians.  None of those and gaming really mix.  I’ve seen friends vomit and pass out due to inebriation.   When gaming, stick with high caffeine sodas.  Coke is always a solid choice, although my poison of choice, is the Mountain Dew family.  Regular or Code Red only.  I’ll post an article about why Game Fuel is considered an act of torture by the Geneva Convention later.  Or if you want to be healthier, Juices full of sugar, like Juicy Juice will keep the blood flowing.  Sweet/Green Teas are also great, especially if you want to cool down.

Cereals: Milk and Cereal, Milk and Cereal, Cereal and Milk, Cereal and Milk, Cereal and Milk… Yes, I love G-Love, and saw them a few years back at Langerado.  Great show.  Anyways, Milk and Cereal is a suitable snack.  Between the sugartastic Frosted Flakes (They’re Great!) and Cinnamon Toast Crunch, to healthier Chex and Cheerios, eating cereal at 3 am is probably going to be your breakfast, especially when you wake up at 4 pm (I don’t do this, thanks to a full time job, I am lucky to wake up after 1 pm).  I highlight that I prefer to skip the bowl, crap a mug, fill the sucker to the brim, and that way you have something with a handle.

Marijua-hah hah, yeah, not getting into that here.  Although it will make you want to consume all of these.  And more.

Real Foods: Sometimes you want real food and/or Proteins.  Fast Food Burgers are great, especially those with a $.99 value menu.  But that doesn’t exactly feed a group, and if you try, they will fuck up your order.  Pizza is great because it can be affordable and can feed an army.  And sometimes that grease gives you that slight burst of speed on the buttons.  Sandwiches are also a good source of meat, but they usually do take two hands.

I’m sure this hasn’t taught you anything you didn’t already know, but it may have given you perspective into what to choose the next time you call the group over for Brawl or Halo.  Or when you provide none of the above and your fridge is empty the next day.

Later Days,



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